I am charmed and mesmerized. I am a mom. Something so vast in someone so small. I still feel that I can't take her in. It is hard to reconcile this child in my arms with any previous notion of parenthood. The little body nestled into my neck is a person I will know the rest of my life--someone who will continue to delight and fascinate me.
It has been a day absent of routine for Olive but now we are totally enjoying a moment together--both of us with full tummies, enjoying the peaceful swoon of Aram Kachachurian (a classical composer I was unfamiliar with). The computer screen is now rivaling the lingering twilight as our primary source of light. The fire has dwindled to a glow but I'm hesitant to disturb Olive to add another piece of wood. Her breathing is quick, uneven wisps and sighs intermittent with grunts or a solitary hiccup.